


Breakdown

by Kiloueka



Series: Let Go [1]
Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: Bittersweet, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Kisses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-23 03:45:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12498008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiloueka/pseuds/Kiloueka
Summary: 2B lets her emotions out after rescuing 9S from Adam. She decides to show him some tenderness after all he just went through.





	Breakdown

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MeetTheTank](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeetTheTank/gifts).



> STILL ALIVE MOTHERFUCKERS  
> I haven't given up on fic writing yet, I'm just SUPER FUCKING STUCK on my next chapter in my series. So I'm making work on some more oneshots until I can get it out. I have AT LEAST 20 more chapters planned so it's not ending anytime soon, I'm just stuck because dialogues a pain.
> 
> So here, have some sad for now.
> 
> Anyway this piece is gonna be a 2 parter. Next ones gonna be smut so imma be uploading them in separate parts so I can have separate ratings for each.

“I've retrieved 9S alive and have brought him to the Resistance camp for emergency treatment.” 2B relayed to the Commander in her usual cool, composed tone. “He sustained heavy damage from the machine lifeform known as Adam and is currently being treated by Resistance medics. I've also forwarded my combat data from the fight to my operator."

“Great work, 2B.” The commander responded. “Now that 9S is back, all missing units have been accounted for. Dead and alive. We've sent a shuttle down to retrieve the injured troops for repair back at the bunker. ”

“I see.”

“That said,” her tone softened, “I'm glad to see that 9S is alive. Both your work against the goliath and Adam was outstanding. I am awaiting both your safe returns to the Bunker. Goodbye.”

“Thank you Commander.” 2B said as her holo-screen flashed away. She turned to the door of her room just as Devola and Popola exited and approached.

“We patched him up the best we could.” Popola said. “It's best to just let him rest for now until the shuttle arrives. He's been through so much in the past few hours.”

“I know.” 2B responded, quietly. “Thank you.”

“Don't mention it.” Devola responded, giving 2B a quick pat on the shoulder. “It is our job after all.”

“Right.” She mumbled.

“And 2B?” 

“Yeah?”

“Stay with him. He needs it, you both do.”

2B flinched slightly at her words. “I know. I will. Thank you.”

“We'll be nearby. If anything happens, we'll be over in a flash. Now go.”

“All right.” 2B nodded before quietly slipping back into their room.

She scanned her surroundings quickly; nothing looked out of place, everything there was almost uncomfortably normal-looking in contract to her injured and unconscious partner laid out on the bed. His wounds were wrapped tightly and thickly with bandages and his bloody, tattered YoRHa uniform had been replaced with simple white shirt and shorts. His visor had been removed and lay carefully folded by his head. She carefully studied his soft features and  slight frown as she stood over him, and had she not known any better, she could have assumed he was just sleeping.

The battler pulled up a chair and carefully sat down next to her partner. She watched the slow rise and fall of his chest for another few minutes before being overcome with desire to just hold him, care for him, and stay by his side until all his pain melted away. To stay by his side forever. She let out a soft half-laugh for she knew all that was just a pipe dream as she awaited the inevitable message from command to... No. This wasn't the time to think about that. She needed to watch over him and just... stay in the moment, for now.

“9S?” She whispered, leaning closer. No response.

“9S?” She repeated, a little louder. Still nothing.

“N-nines?” The corner of his lips twitched up ever so slightly, but other than that, nothing.

Alert: Unit 9S is still in emergency shutdown mode. Proposal: Due to his extensive injuries, the best option would be to wait until Unit 9S is repaired before giving him your message.”

“I know pod.” She huffed. “Go on standby and conduct self-maintenance. Reboot in two hours.”

“Affirmative.”

2B turned her attention back to the sleeping scanner and sighed deeply. She leaned over him and reached her hand out to him, hovering just inches from his face; so close that she could faintly feel the heat radiating from his skin through her glove. She paused, but with some effort, pushed her hand the final distance to bridge the gap between them. 

The warmth of his face soaked through her glove just as the pain of killing him soaked deep into her heart and tore it apart, piece by piece. A wave of sorrow hit her and she could no longer keep her thoughts at bay.

_Why does it have to be him?_

_Why does it have to be me?_

_He's never done anything wrong._

_He's never done anything to hurt anyone._

_Why do they want him dead? Erased? Destroyed?_

_And then that monster._

_Adam._

_Everything he did to him._

_Disgusting._

_Awful._

_Terrible._

_Just like I am._

_Cold._

_Cruel._

_Distant._

_I just... I just want to be with him._

_Please, just let me hold him, love him, call him Nines._

_Why can't we just run away?_

_Hide in the darkest corners of the earth where no one would even think to look?_

_So I can be_

_Kind._

_Caring._

_Tender._

She thinks back to a time where she tried just that and grit her teeth at the memory.

 

 

> _“2B please...I can't... You know we can't do this.”_ 9S--Nines said softly.  _“They'll find us eventually. You know they will.”_
> 
> _“They won't. They won't. I won't let them. I can't do this anymore. I can protect you, I can keep us safe.”_
> 
> He had simply smiled and reached out to tenderly wipe a stray tear from her cheek. Such a small gesture, but it was enough to turn her legs into jelly as she threw herself on him and her weight pulled them both to the ground.
> 
> They both lie there in the dirt and leaves as 9S stroked her hair while they both weathered her storm together.
> 
> _“2B,”_ He had whispered.  _“The thought of losing you and never seeing you again is so much more terrifying than the thought of meeting and forgetting you over and over. So please, I want you to do this for me.”_
> 
> She trembled in his arms and dug her fingers deep into his back as he stayed strong and smiled for her.
> 
> _“...All right... I promise.”_

 

“N-no.” 2B said aloud. She gasped and put her hand to her mouth, as if she could push the words back down her throat. Her eyes flashed towards her partner's sleeping face, but breathed a tiny sigh of relief to see that he had not heard.

“I'm sorry, Nines. I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have to suffer any more than... I couldn't even protect you from  _him_ .” She whispered, as she shuddered, trying to shake away the hot tears that began bubbling up in her eyes. Her other hand came up against the other side of his face, fingertips just pushing through his silky hair. “I can't even protect you from myself. But I...”

Her body gravitated forward until her face was parallel to his, lips so dangerously close. Self control took over that time, pulling her head down and pushing it into his chest instead. She breathed in deeply and inhaled the sweet floral scent that still clung to his body from his last bath.

“You're so kind.” She mumbled. “You still treat me so gently after all I've done to hurt you.

A knot formed in her throat as the tears became harder and harder to fight away.

“You're so cruel.” She groaned. “Why won't you let me run? Why won't you let me protect you?”

“You're so... so...” She couldn't hold it back anymore. She let out a long wail as her body forced all her emotions out at once, spilling onto the floor and filling the room with the sound of her pain. 

Her cries grew in intensity until she was sure the entire camp could hear her. She couldn't stop herself now that it started, and she almost didn't care who heard her. Almost. 

She spilled out everything she felt in that moment. Every emotion turned to liquid and poured out of her eyes until the fabric of her visor could absorb no more of it. Her tears streamed down her face in multiple places as she leaned back and screamed to the sky in the faint hopes that maybe somewhere, there was some god that was willing to listen to her pleas.

She cried for everything they've lost.

She cried for everything they'll never gain.

She cried for every time she had to say “no” when all she wanted to do was scream “yes”.

She cried for him.

She cried for her.

She cried for every laugh, for every smile, for ever _“Nines”_ she had to bite back just so she could keep her own heart from shattering completely.

She cried for the past.

She cried for the future.

She cried, and cried, and cried until her voice became hoarse and all that escaped her lips were short gasps and raspy breaths.

That wasn't enough to stop her as her tears continued streaming down her face until they too trickled to a stop.

Her throat was raw and she could feel herself shaking as her body screamed for water.

She stayed still; head still pointed to the sky, mouth still open in a silent scream, until she felt gravity slowly pull her weakened frame back down to his chest, where she lightly rested her face against him once more. There, she continued sobbing silently, yet still being careful not to shake his body and reopen any wounds.

Some unknown amount of time passed and she began willing herself to get up and get back to her duties. But there was nothing more she could do but wait until she was given another assignment. Something that she hoped would come soon so she could use it to help push her feelings deep down again, back where they belonged.

But, before she could do that, a hand curled around her back and weakly pulled her back down. She tensed up and was ready to bolt before she heard a soft groan come from her partner.

“2B...” He mumbled quietly. “2B... don't... leave...”

“9-9S.” She barely managed to rasp out.

“P-please.”

He curled his fingers against her shoulder and winced as he pulled her even closer.

“Y-your arms.”

“It's ok.” He breathed. “Pain meds.” She didn't quite believe they were working that well, but she couldn't bring herself to argue. He seemed to be happy about it and that's all that mattered at the moment.

She didn't say anything in response, she couldn't, not with her throat completely shredded like it was. She just continued to lie there, listening to all the quiet sounds that told her he was still alive in that moment.

He moved his hand up her back slowly until his fingers wrapped around her visor and slowly tugged it off. She stiffened as it began to slide away, but did nothing to stop him. She couldn't hide her pain, her sorrow from him anymore. She pulled back and looked him in the eyes as he weakly tossed her soaking visor to the side.

“Pretty... eyes...” He smiled as he met her gaze. She stared back, admiring every little detail in his complex network of fibers and glass that held so much expression. She knew how he felt. His eyes said everything his voice couldn't in that moment. They said everything he's said to her before, everything his mind couldn't remember. It seemed his body could never forget. 

It could never forget the way she touched him... the way he touched her when she let her self control shatter and give into desire. His eyes held the memories of the worry and fear that flashed through them when he woke up to her crying beside him after she realized what she had done... again. 

_“Oh god 2B did I hurt you? I'm so sorry, please tell me what I did wrong.”_ Is what he would say, every time.

_No it wasn't you. It's never you. It's always me, me, me, me_ _. I was selfish and now I've only hurt us both even more. Please, don't ever blame yourself for my failures._

She didn't doubt he could read her eyes as well. She only hoped that he couldn't read too deeply, but at the same time, she did. She let them soften and her lips curl upward in a small smile.

“I'm glad you're ok.” She breathed. She found her hand sliding down his arm until her fingers intertwined with his and squeezed. He squeezed back and smiled.

“I'm glad... you're here.” He mumbled. “I knew you'd... come back... for me.” His voice was still damaged, but she waited patiently for the words to form.

She nodded. There were so many things she wanted to say right then that she knew if she opened her mouth only an unintelligible mixture of syllables would come out. He squeezed her hand once again and his smile grew just a sliver.

Maybe she could give in again, just a little, just to comfort him as he waited for help to arrive. Maybe he would think it was a dream, as she was sure the pain and medicine was likely messing with his ability to differentiate reality from fiction.

Yeah, that's it, she'd just hold him a bit longer and then she'd go back to her old ways. Just to help her calm herself down so she could focus better on her upcoming missions.

Her eyes trailed down to his mouth and rested on his soft lips. They were parted slightly, as he worked to smile even more for her. She felt gravity pulling against her once again as she leaned forward to let go even more.

He closed his eyes and sighed as her lips met his. He pushed up against her weakly, but there was only so much he could do in return in his current condition. It didn't matter much to her, as she felt the rush of emotions flow through his soft skin and into hers after refraining for so long.

She pushed a bit harder, as she carefully watched his expression to make sure she didn't go too far. She took his bottom lip gently in her teeth and ran her tongue against it. He let out a soft sigh in response, encouraging her to explore his lips a bit more. She moved to a corner, then to the other and trailed her lips upward until they rested atop a small tear that was forming in his eye.

“Don't cry.” She whispered tenderly, not moving from where she was. 

“Happy.” He responded. “Happy... tears.”

“I'm glad.” She kissed him there once again before trailing back to his lips, to his chin, to his neck, his collarbone, and pulling back. He opened his eyes that sparkled with tears and smiled, and she returned it even more.

She sat back up in her chair and the smile vanished from his face.

“W-wait. Don't leave.” He gasped.

“I'm not, I promise.” She said as she tugged her boots off and carefully climbed over him until she was nestled against his side. She pressed her face in the crook of his neck and wrapped her arm around him protectively. He relaxed again as he realized she had no intention of leaving any time soon. 

“Now rest. You deserve it. I won't leave your side until the healers arrive and get you some proper care.”

“Mmm.” He nodded as sleep started pulling him back down. “Promise me... you won't... leave my side... ever.”

She paused at his request as her grip tightened around his arm subconsciously. Word for word, it was the same request he had asked her time and time again. It hurt her to hear it again, but she smiled anyway and pushed her face deeper into his neck.

“...All right... I promise.”


End file.
